WAHM Struggling with Depression
Tips for other WAHM struggling with depression is today’s Wellness Wednesday. In case you haven’t heard of the term WAHM; it means work at home mom. These tips though can help anyone who is a work at home parent or struggles with mental health.
Trying to do it all like I sometimes try to do? Feeling pulled every which way? Guess what you can’t do it all and it’s okay! Here are some tips to try to focus on what you want most and get the support you need to reach your goals.
1. Support from Spouse (or Family & Friends)
Sometimes you just need to vent to hear it out loud and then move on. I’ve told my husband this and when I say something that he can just reply back, “That must have been frustrating” or something to that effect. Now when he says it to me, I smile knowing that he understands and can move on. I’m so grateful for his support.
2. Time Blocking or Designated Days
This tip was shared a bit on our Motivational Mondays. I learned this tip from some of my leaders at a training. Now as a WAHM struggling with depression, it is one of my best tips to support my mental health. Schedule your week out having set times to do things: chores, time with family, business activities, self-care, church responsibilities, etc. Then stick to those times unless it’s an emergency!
Several years ago I was called to be the president of a women’s organization within my church in a very high needs ward. Later in life I was a the vice president in my HOA. Then I also had my third baby 6.5 later than my first 2 children. So sticking to my time blocking has been helpful in not making feel so stressed out. If my time block right now is blogging, and someone from church calls (I use a Google Voice number just for church calls when I was the president in this women’s organization), then I only answer if they leave a message saying it’s an emergency. I have found that people aren’t as in a hurry as they want us to think.
I was super excited for the Erin Condren planner hourly weekly layout when it first came out! It helps take my time blocking and other planner stuff on the go =)
For those with young kids at home, you might have to do smaller increments of time like 15-30 minutes. I’ve tried to play with my kids for 15-30 minutes and then tell them mommy has to work for 30 minutes next.
Having set days for things also might be helpful. Since a lot of my business is currently on Social Media with my job as the Social Media Manager and my other job as a Wellness Advocate and Wednesdays aren’t the best days for sharing on Facebook, I try and designate most of the day Wednesdays (and part of Saturdays) for cleaning: laundry, floors, counters, big organization jobs, etc. Yes, my house can look crazy the rest of the week, but I’m not great at cleaning so this works for me. Otherwise again I can feel like I’m pulled in too many directions and get stressed out which can trigger my depression. Then I all I want to do is lay in bed hiding out.
3. Focus on Strengths
Cleaning is not my strength, but organizing is so I’m much happier doing that more often —- that’s why major cleaning is only one or two days a week for me. Don’t worry my husband is an awesome cleaner so he helps the other days when needed. We make a really great time. Currently we moved into a new house and with both of us working at home full time we have split up chores differently now than we used to. For example, he rinses out all the dishes for me and I put them in the dishwasher. When they are clean, I put them away which caters better to my organizational strength.
Business wise, social media comes naturally to me so I do most of my business on there to help spread my business nation wide, not just locally.
To learn more about your strengths and putting energy into that, then sourcing out for your weaknesses when you can, read The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks. I get so much more done when I focus on my strengths than my weaknesses.
If you really want a weakness to be a strength, then find a mentor and ask them how they do it. Great tip I read from a personal development book I’m reading, The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. “Be willing to be educated so that it can become a strength faster….or you might learn that you don’t enjoy it like you thought you would. Yes you could learn how to do everything by yourself, but that’s not very effective.”
4. Personal Development Books
Motivational books that help me understand and develop myself more so I can continue to grow in all areas of my life. I mentioned two in my #3 tip. Reading just 10 minutes a day can help you grow exponentially. Ideas form for me from reading and also help me to help others in my business, family/social life, and in my church responsibilities.
One of my favorite personal development books is The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson. Reading that helped me to know that the little things I do matter and will make a difference in time as long as I am consistent. Too many times, people quit right away because something doesn’t work out. I’ve found if you keep going especially in something you love, you’ll learn and grow and find what works for you as long as you’re consistent in it. It’s all about one step at a time and added together compound exponentially.
5. Self Care
Next for me as a WAHM struggling with depression, self-care includes proper nutrition/eating right. I love 100 Days of Real Food’s ideas on nutrition. For me I use essential oils and essential vitamins and supplements to keep me focused, motivated and energized each day. When I don’t do this, my day tends to drag and I get irritable easier.
Other parts of self-care for me include yoga, meditation, joyful breathing, reading, praying, and journaling. Also I try to do something from my joy list: crafting, dates with my husband, etc. I try to pick 1-2 of these each day. Life is so busy and you need time block this as well. When I get my self-care in, everything else tends to fall more into place.
What tips do you have to share as someone who is WAHM struggling with depression especially when people ask how do you do it?
Which of these topics do you want to learn more about or need to improve in?